Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Talking in (Star) Tongues


A brief break from the lunacies of homeopathy for something much more sensible: Solreta Antaria (EoR suspects this is not her Real Name but wonders why if she has such "a strong connection with the star system Sirius" she isn't called Solreta Siruisa?).

Solreta appeared last night on John Safran's Speaking in Tongues claiming to be an 'indigo' child (all born around 1980 she informed us - shades of John Wyndham's The Midwich Cuckoos), to have been clairvoyant from an early age, to be able to speak in ancient tongues (Atlantean, or was it Sirian? EoR got a bit confused) and to have higher spiritual and psychic energies. She then proceeded to speak in her magic language (which other 'indigo' children can apparently understand without training). EoR was unfortunately unprepared for this, and was unable to transcribe it, but it seemed to be some sort of faux-Polynesian with a preponderance of vowels ("ah ooh ah nana wanny woo" etc). It also seems to be related to her self-created magic which she calls Sirian Healing:

In short, the energy that this star brings has a profound effect on humanity and Solreta has learnt to harness this in a healing manner that brings the client to a greater spiritual awareness. [...] Solreta primarily provides her healings through the Sacred Sirian language of love that touches the very depths of our souls. This vibrational healing is a key to unlocking blocked emotions and energies from the past, within this life or others. The healings also utilize a frequencing alignment with Gems, Flower Essences, Sound and Colour with each session being unique and different for everybody.


Unique and different? EoR is suitably impressed.

Mr Safran invited viewers who understood her glossolaliac gibberish to email the translation to him. EoR was struck with a blinding light, and was perhaps one of the few who truly understood her words. He immediately dashed off the important information that Solreta had channelled to him: "If you take too many drugs you can end up like me. Just say 'no'".

EoR looks forward to the emails of other enlightened beings.

Solreta could be described as many things: bizarre, scary (she has these unsettling staring eyes), loony, deranged, or possibly just grasping and manipulative.

She's a fully qualified therapist in such powerful modalities as Holistic (or is it Wholistic?) Kinesiology, Transformational Kinesiology (doesn't (W)Holistic Kinesiology also, by definition, include this?), Reiki, Crystal Dreaming™ ("These techniques open all channels to the spirit world and beyond, facilitating interdimensional travel" - $A100), Alchemy and Soul Star Workshops.

She also runs the Australian College of Energetic Medicine (presumably, as opposed to the Australian College of Lazy Medicine). This is a Registered Training Organisation. EoR wonders what you have to do to qualify as a Registered Training Organisation. It seems it's all about having audit procedures in place, and complaints procedures, and so on. What you're actually proposing to 'teach' has nothing to do with it. For example, providing Dimensional Therapy:

"Dimensional Therapy also frontiers the application of sacred geometry to the physical body, putting the Egyptian dimensional principles into a technical application and using ancient math to align the frequencies of the human vehicle with corresponding Egyptian healing secrets".


Where does this knowledge come from? Apparently, it is "channelled information from Kryon, the Pleiades, Orion, Lyra and Vega systems". EoR is appalled that someone who casually chats to beings from other star systems is a Registered Training Organisation. Presumably, all you need is a Certificate of Lunacy. Furthermore,

"Dimensional Therapy is the art of identification of destabilisations in the five bodies of human consciousness. The body is re-stabilised through the use of comprehensive correspondences to sacred geometry, planetary influences, connection point and string interferences, and dimensional life interchange and recognition techniques. Unlocking the secrets hidden in numbers, the Qabalah, The Flower of Life and sacred geometry, the body can be restabilised. Analysing and feeling the auric and etheric pattern, distortions in the physical energy field are identified through the use of forearm frequency matching".


EoR can feel his brain turning to mush already...

Solreta also sells tuning forks which can tune in angels and crystals, and designs and sells newage jewelry including The African Mother:

A cool breeze blows through the open planes of the African land, there is a woman boldly standing with her children who are crying over the loss of their farther, his ashes are carried away in the wind. The strength of their mother is reflected in the powerful beads she wears around her neck. Her name is Isis. This combination is very powerful, the tigers iron helps bring out inner strength and give the power to keep on going, it maintains and balances the root chakra, and is very good for emotional release, it is also beneficial for those who are feeling exhausted.


and the Elfian Princess:

This necklace comes from the old world, it is said that when worn it will align you to the ethereal plane; this is where the more subtle beings live. Rainbows woven in copper, this necklace reflects the delicate nature of the elves.
"We elves work with the mother (nature), who speaks to us all, she is part of us, take time to stop and listen, and you can find your heart amongst the trees."

15 comments:

  1. I was suprised to see a well respected medical college (ACEM= Australian college of Emergency Medicine http://www.acem.org.au/ )involved in this charlatan rubbish, but realise now that the "other" ACEM (the one using "Ancient Wisdom-modern science") has the same acronym. Silly myself, I sort of though that these things were registered. Well, registered with a proper authority, not simply with Sirius.

    Dr John

    ReplyDelete
  2. What is even weirder is that I understood what she said and I am not comfortable with it. Could someone please explain? Just a lucky shot or an I really an Indigo Child??

    ReplyDelete
  3. This stupid lady is a fake, lair , charlatan.
    the only person worse, is LAURA BUSHNELL, A FRAUD, A LAIR, A CON ARTIST. LAURA BUSHNELL LIES and tells people she has the breast milk of the Virgin Mary. Bushnell lies and tells poeple she can make a fountain of cosmic water come out of her hand, claiming supernatural powers. Bushnell, a WICCAN WITCH, is much worse than this creepy lady.
    These two liars should be locked up together to see who comes out alive.

    ReplyDelete
  4. is she the same as this person:

    www.magicklady.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. laura bushnell is good person and has helped me alot, to each his own i guess. i think she is a very nice woman.
    a friend.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I watched the safran show with keen interest with their talk of indigo children and star people, and when she spoke the language I eagerly did my best to understand it. I did not, but was delighted to see ( in the follow-up episode) that so many other people did. I didnt feel that way at first but it quickly passed as soon as I realised that I'd rather live in a world knowing that I am not star children but some people, are rather than in a world where no one is. Seeing our world right now and how we mere humans are treating it we really do need outside help desperately if its available, and maybe the star people can help us help ourselves :D

    love and Light
    Ryk

    ReplyDelete
  7. Laura Bushnell had a terrible childhood. Before age 8 she had to do all the cooking and cleaning at the farm with no help at all from her lazy parents and siblings. In her spare time she helped plow the fields and went out into the wilderness to train feral cats. Her parents were not educated or religious. So I guess she has a good excuse for being the way she is. So stop picking on her.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Did Laura really study under Mother Teresa? Can she really change the weather? Does she really know what we are thinking?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Regarding Laura Bushnell.
    I have recently had a very positive phone consultation from Laura Bushnell. I live in Chicago and since she is in California opted for the phone. I first heard of her through one of my favorite bookstores in Chicago, Transitions.
    www.transitionsbookplace.com
    I saw Laura speak there in Chicago in Feb.2006 and was very impressed. I bought her book "Life Magic" Before deciding on doing the consultation I did some research and came upon this blog and saw the negative comment, however on her website www.magicklady.com there are very positive testimonials about her. I used my gut, my intuition and really liked my reading. Laura has given me some great advice. I have done some of the exercises in her book that seem silly but since she said they are very powerful, I tried them and really they are powerful in a positive, revitalizing, empowering way!
    Happy Chicago Customer of Laura Bushnell.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Dear Happy Chicago Customer, thanks for your spamming AND trolling. You are keen! Welcome to the Second Sight, where something you haven't heard of called Critical Thinking is regularly applied.

    For example, take this small test:
    What would you expect to find on a business website:
    a) wholly positive testimonials
    b) wholly negative testimonials
    c) a mix of the above?

    Let me help out those tired brain cells a little bit, and give you a small clue. It's not B or C.

    I'm glad you liked your reading and felt it was useful advice. I'm sure Laura liked you paying her. Hence the symbiotic commercial relationship keeps everyone happy.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I can guarantee that the "happy chicago customer" is Laura Bushnell herself. notice it is using the same language and "points" as the fake (positive)reviews of her own book, that she posted on Barnes and Noble.
    yeah, she spams and trolls every body who goes to her site, she even examines profiles before returning email.
    it is called "paranoia."
    Laura, you are not contributing to the positive evolution of this planet.
    Cease your childish attempts to convince others of your "secret kownledge."
    All lies will be revealed.

    ReplyDelete
  12. there are pictures of Laura Bushnell WITH the "relics of the Virgin Mary", posted on myspace,com, under her name.

    Bushnell is responsible for the plagiarism, the lies and profoundly irresponsible
    "spiritual" advice she gave in her "life magic" book.

    ReplyDelete
  13. When I went to Laura Bushnell as a client, she told me that I was a prostitute in my last life. Bushnell then told my firend the same thing in her session, then I heard from a family memeber of Laura's ,,that she says that to eveyone! Must be her inate anger and jealousy towards all women that would drive her to say such stupid things under the guise of her "knowing." She also told my friend that her "chakras" are warped. Chakras dont even exist! What a CON! Of course, my friend she said that to is very beautiful, so I can see WHY Laura would be soso jealous of her. From Laura Bushnell's website she is announcing that her husband left her, her fourth husband. Thank Goodness he got away from her. She is also claiming, on her website, that she will be on TV this summer, boyohboy,,,gee,, can't wait for that!!
    Run people, RUN away from Laura Bushnell, the sssssssssssssssssssssnake.

    ReplyDelete
  14. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Dear Laura Bushnell fans and enemies. You've made your point. Repeatedly. How stupid are you? Take your crystal ball and your bat and go home.

    ReplyDelete