Thursday, August 10, 2006

Bad Psychics

A man has been arrested for the murder of lawyer David Robinson.

Glascott, who claims to be a "spiritual clairvoyant" who can heal relationship breakdowns and other problems, was arrested by Special Operations Group police during a raid on his unit about 8.20pm on Wednesday. [...] On a website he claims to be a "spiritual clairvoyant with the answers to love spells". He says that on a trip to Morocco in 1990 he discovered "crystal dust", a substance with the power to heal broken hearts and relationships. His website says that for $US900 ($A1195) he will mail out some of the powerful dust. Mr De Young told the court that Glascott was on medication and suffered from physical and psychological conditions.


Is this any sort of advertisement for his clairvoyant healing powers? He failed to see his own arrest. Or, obviously, to apply the love dust to himself. And how can you tell he suffers from psychological conditions, since his psychic claims are exactly the same as all the other psychics' claims? As if further proof of his delusional claims is warranted:

During a brief court appearance yesterday, Glascott's lawyer, Michael De Young, said: "Because he is unable to contact his daughters himself, he has asked me on his behalf to express his love for them".


He's a psychic! He could have contacted his daughters anytime, anywhere!

While on the subject of delusional psychics, "real*" psychic Alison Dubois is making excuses for why her "real" psychic powers don't always measure up. You can fool the dead, apparently, but some of those tricky living people just can't be satisfied.

ALLISON DuBois sees dead people. She also sees live ones. And it's the live ones who cause most of the trouble.
"Live people are much trickier," says the Arizona psychic, whose life forms the basis for Patricia Arquette's hit TV series Medium. "They are very hard. When people come up to me, they're looking me in the eye, searching for something -- waiting for me to unravel a mystery for them about, you know, a child that was murdered or a father who committed suicide when they were two. "It's very difficult to look those people in the eye and send them away with anything less than what they're expecting.
"Most of the time, if I'm out somewhere and I see someone who is accompanied (by a spirit), I will not say anything. You have to be very careful about this. You can't just barge in on people and say, 'I can see your spouse with you'."


No, because a) you'd probably be arrested and end up in a psychiatric institution and b) you'll frequently be wrong.

Alison's habitual modesty shines throughout the interview:

As well as trying to help individuals and police who ask for help -- as Arquette's character does on the show -- DuBois consults on jury selections where her ability to "read" people helps pick sympathetic jurors. She also consults on Medium and was keen from the beginning to portray herself as an ordinary working wife and mother as well as the crime-fighting spiritualist.


Holy Shazam, Batman! EoR wonders whether she wears a cape when she's out assisting Commissioner Gordon everytime he flashes the Psychic Batlight to get her to solve yet another mysterious crime that the Police are completely baffled by. Oh, hang on, that bit's fiction. She's never actually been consulted by the police.

EoR wonders if Alison predicted a skeptical response to her fatuous claims.

*Not associated with any "real" psychics currently endorsed by Gary Schwartz.

4 comments:

  1. EoR knew you were going to say that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. How about you get back to us when someone passes the Randi Challenge, top?

    Please note that I know ahead of time that you'll be making excuses. I also know that you won't read the rules. And if you're one of the sorts that changes the subject to the money, I know you'll avoid looking at the evidence that Goldman-Sachs can provide.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Commissioner Gordon doesn't need to use a "Psychic Batlight"; she'll know when he needs her and will no doubt hop into her Quantum Psychmobile or her Auracycle and scoot right over to cleanse the neighborhood of evil thinkers.
    Bruce

    ReplyDelete

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