Dotty Horses

Diana Thompson kindly provides information on Do-It-Yourself Feature Acupressure to calm your Horse". The theory is that Qi

runs in invisible rivers or lines through the body somewhat like the electrical energy system which provides power to your home. [...] Over thousands of years, TCM practitioners have documented exactly where these lines, known as meridians, flow and what organs or systems of the body they influence. Acupuncture or acupressure points are unique points on the meridians which, if stimulated properly, can increase or decrease the energy flow within the system. Once proper flow of energy is restored, physical and emotional health can be maintained.

The most important of these well-known but completely undetectable magic rivers is the Governing Vessel:

The Governing Vessel actually originates in the horse's reproductive organs and surfaces on the outside of the body just under the horse's tail. It then flows directly up the backbone of the horse. It travels up the midline of the back, along the top of the neck, over the top of the head and down the middle of the horse's head to his upper lip. The last point on the outside of the body is on the inside of the horse's upper lip just where the lip joins the gum.

EoR wonders what happens to the Governing Vessel in geldings? Does all the magic ectoplasm just drop out? But he shouldn't make fun:

The point known as Governing Vessel 26 can even restart the heart and respiration of an animal in shock.

Strong stuff indeed if it can bring the dead back to life. Of course, it's easier to make a statement like that than to actually show even one example of a Lazarus-like resurrection.

One of the functions of Governing Vessel energy in the body is to contain or keep organs in their proper place.

Without proper maintenance, presumably all the internal organs will just wander off...

EoR had trouble following some of the instructions though:

Location: Yin Tang is the name of the point located on the midline directly between the horse's eyebrows.

Since horses don't have eyebrows (presumably, a fact that could have been easily ascertained by simple empirical means) he has some doubt about the veracity of the rest of this stuff. And never mind that the 'exact locations' of meridians have been discovered:

Don't worry about being perfectly on the site of the acupressure point. Acupressure does not have to be extremely precise.

There are even photographs of the practitioner explaining

To be technically right on the point, I should have my hand up approximately ½ inch higher.

The photos, unfortunately, don't show any livers returning to their rightful place, or a dead horse being miraculously revived, but just a horse standing around looking at things. According to Diana, however

Now, the acupressure point is really working!

EoR assumes Diana is channelling the Little Red Engine: "The acupressure can work! The acupressure can work!"