Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Metatronical madness

As EoR has previously noted, people performing improbable ethods of treating disease and who, largely, are dismissive if not completely antagonistic of conventional medicine still crave the legitimisation and authority of that same conventional medicine. Hence the Australian Medical Intuitives Association, Inc, a group of 'Professional Practitioners' of 'Medical' intuition. Without those code words, it would just be some people guessing what was wrong with you based on a completely wrong view of physiology. As an example, "Diabetes is often the result of feeling unloved".

One of these 'Professional Practitioners' is Carmel Bell, who promotes Metatronic Energy® and is also the founder of the College of Medical Intuition, as well as the founder and President of the previously mentioned AMIA (the easy way to give yourself 'professional' legitimisation — set up a couple of organisations yourself, and claim their imprimatur, rather than meeting the stringent requirements of an established authority like, for example, the Australian Medical Board). And, while

She has worked successfully with thousands of people, dealing with a wide variety of concerns, ranging from panic/anxiety disorder, systemic illness, cancer, traumatic injury, nerve injury and emotional problems, to name a few dysfunctions.


she also adds the usual disclaimer

Carmel Bell is not a Medical Practitioner and claims no training in Medicine, Alternative health Fields or Psychology. A consultation with a Medical Intuitive is not meant to take the place of advice or treatment by a qualified professional in these fields. Any condition requiring medical care should be attended to by your Health Care practitioner.

The information given on this website is a guide only and is not intended to replace any advice or guidance given to you by any health care practitioner or medical practitioner that you consult with. Carmel Bell accepts no responsibility for any choices or actions you may make to your health care routine based on your interpretation of the information provided on this website.


This is slightly different from the normal disclaimer, which admist the seller has no conventional medical knowledge, since it also adds that Ms Bell has no alternative medical knowledge. In effect, she has no idea at all, and accepts absolutely no responsibility for making guesses based on her total lack of knowledge.

Also, like others of her ilk, she runs seminars (though she at least has the originality to call them 'Funshops') at AU$450, as well as training ('Price on application'). And now she has a book: When All Else Fails. She includes the breathless review Nova gave to her book:

Not many people can claim to have visited the borders of death and live to tell the tale in fascinating detail. Carmel Bell has - (on three occasions. Of all the stoires I've reead over the years, hers is one of the most extraordinary.) (...) Carmel was four years old when she somehow set herself on fire and died, albeit briefly. She travelled down the tunnel, familiar to so many near death experiences and towardsa glowing light. At the gates of heaven, JEsus and an Archangel named Metatron gave Carmel a healing gift, Metatronic Energy, which she later used to heal her bruned body and her damaged kidneys.


Wow! All those burns and severe injuries cured solely by Metatronic Energy! Because, of course, if she'd actually gone to hospital and relied on modern medical treatment and the skills of a team of medical professionals she'd acknowledge that, wouldn't she? Presumably, Metatron also advised her to register his name as a trademark as well.

It's virtually impossible to explain away Carmel's near death experience on the the night of February 15th 2009 when she had a cardiac arrest, died for 47 minutes and suffered severe brain damage. She was placed in a coma for four days and then spent six weeks in intensive care. The medical prognosis was she would be dependant on care all her life. Of course, the doctors did not take into account Carmel's indefatigable spirit - or her access to Metatronic Energy. Carmel is today a walking, talking miracle. Never was there such a case of "physician heal thyself".


Some might argue that she did, in fact, suffer brain damage. Her third death must have been fairly uninteresting, since it's not mentioned in the review. And, clearly, it's not a case of 'phsician heal thyself' since she's stated she's not a physician, not even a pretend altie sort.

Such magic belief systems, in the face of lack of evidence, rely on the personal anecdote:

One of the most touching casr studies in this book involves a deparately ill woman named Carla, a mother and wife who had lived her life for her family. Carmel uncovered Carla's deep-seated feelings of disempowerment and being trapped in life, (she also continued her raditation therapy). About a year later, Carla was free from cancer and she was living a happier life.


So, which do you think cured Carla? Metatronic Energy®, or radiation therapy?

Sadly, no matter how often Ms Bell notes that Metatron is her personally trademarked and registered angel, he doesn't seem to be listening to her. He allows himself to be channelled by others:

Metatron: These you refer to as Yeti or those termed, Bigfoot, are earlier versions of the genetic experiment on Earth, primarily from the phase of Atlantis some 20,000 years ago. At that time there were many genetic experiments on your planet. These beings are intelligent, but genetically impaired. These massive forms were genetically created using human DNA with that of the ape to create a laboring humanoid beast, a beast with greater intelligence, human like intelligence, but with imposed genetic wiring or implants that ‘unplugged’ certain areas of the brain.

(...)

You see, the grid alignments, powernodes, and white holes that exist on your planet do not just exist on dry land, most of them exist, in fact on over and under waters. Dolphins, primarily, and in a few cases whales, align their energies to these sites in assisting to balance the energy of your planet.


Who would have thought that the wonderfully newagey Atlantis, and Stalin's Russia would have had so much in common?

Metatron even seems to have branched out, providing Pippa Merivale with Metatronic Healing® which is presumably totally different from Metatronic Energy®.

He is also, apparently, providing his multidimensional healing modality via the services of a stud alpaca.

1 comment:

  1. That carefully chosen phrase "Worked successfully" crops a lot with quacks. As in "[Quack x] has worked successfully with people suffering from cancer, diabetes, depression, ingrown toenails, hypochondria, tonsilitis, blephitis, ADHD etc etc etc."

    I think it means that the quack has successfully taken money off the people, therefore their work has been successful for the quack.

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