Sunday, February 26, 2006

The Naturopath Prescribes

The holidays are over, and it's back to normal at the ABC, including the return of Michael "I believe in magic" Treloar to the radio, the local naturopath and dispenser of sage advice.

In recent appearances, EoR has learnt how to cure arthritis - an epsom salts soaking. This will remove the uric acid that is the cause of arthritis.

Mr Treloar also expressed some skepticism at the various products such as anti-wrinkle cream advertised in the media since these do not have any studies to support them. He also recommended echinacea (not the cheap echinacea, since that isn't effective, but the "good quality" stuff). Certainly, the expensive stuff will be more effective at boosting naturopath's incomes. Maybe he's just happy there have been studies done of echinacea, no matter what the result.

EoR was also glad to learn that there are only three conditions of the bowel: colitis, and a couple of others which EoR missed in his shock. Maybe that's why it's so much easier to become a naturopath than a real doctor - the medical manual's so much slimmer.

Headaches are almost always caused by neck problems. See your friendly local chiro for a cure. It it's not that, then it's hormonal. Take herbs to cure.

EoR was also concerned at the caller who was advised that red meat was Bad and Evil for people with psoriasis. When the caller told Mr Treloar that he had just recovered from a major illness and his doctor had advised him to eat as much red meat as possible, Mr Treloar refused to relent, and told him again not to eat red meat.

This sort of stuff would be acceptable if it was prefaced not with the standard "general advice only" disclaimer, but a much clearer disclaimer that the whole segment is actually satire and humour, and please don't take anything Mr Treloar says as factual.

Oh, and always get your supplements from the naturopath since they're much better than the commercial stuff. Or did EoR already say that?


  1. I've wracked my brain and can't come up with an illness which would require eating as much red meat as possible during the recovery phase. Iron deficiency or B12 deficiency can be treated with oral supplements(naturopathic of course!). Kwashiorkor is pretty unlikely. That's a severe protein malnutrition, especially in children after weaning, marked by lethargy, growth retardation, anemia, edema, potbelly, skin depigmentation, and hair loss or change in hair color. Are you sure this isn't an example of the conspiracy between the beef industry and doctors?

  2. EoR did wonder about the quality of the medical advice (or at least, the patient's recall of it) but he'll never know what the condition was since Mr Treloar did not inquire about it, and simply advised ignoring the doctor's advice and following his own, much more qualified and sensible, wisdom.

  3. As Mr T should know, the amount of useful iron in leafy greens is less than in red meat. The oxalates and phytates decrease iron absorption in the gut and their non-haem form of iron isn't as well absorbed as meat's haem iron. It is likely this invalid would be struggling to consume the bulk of spinach needed to match the net iron yield of a steak.

    Taking an iron supplement is not an easy alternative. Iron is highly irritating and creates mayhem in the gut (ask anyone who has taken up this challenge). Iron injections produce nasty bruises. Iron infusion is better, but risky and involved.

    So Mr T may have condemned an innocent man (and any number of listeners) to ongoing weakness and illhealth. He may even kill him.

    I am not a beef industrialist or a doctor.

  4. "Ongoing weakness and illhealth"? But isn't that what naturopaths love? Regular treatments and ongoing 'maintenance' for the rest of his life... Ohh, money...


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